The holiday season can be a time of joy and celebration, but it can also bring its fair share of stress, especially when spending time with your in-laws. Whether you're a seasoned pro at dealing with your partner's family or preparing for your first holiday date, these tips will help you get through the season with grace and patience.
Open lines of communication
![Young woman enjoying a cup of coffee outdoors in a street cafe as she sits chatting with her boyfriend or husband in the summer sun](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Couple-communicating-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x684.jpg)
![Young woman enjoying a cup of coffee outdoors in a street cafe as she sits chatting with her boyfriend or husband in the summer sun](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Couple-communicating-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x684.jpg)
Open and honest communication with your partner is the first step to surviving the holidays. Share your concerns and concerns, and encourage your partner to do the same. These conversations can bring you closer and help you set boundaries regarding family gatherings. Remember that you may each have different views on your families, so mutual respect and open communication is vital.
Set realistic expectations
![Shopping together](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Gift-buying-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x732.jpg)
![Shopping together](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Gift-buying-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x732.jpg)
The holiday season can be a whirlwind of activity, from meal preparation to gift shopping and sometimes awkward conversations. Realize that your in-laws have their own unique quirks, traditions, and personalities. Take the opportunity to learn more about your partner and their family by approaching these gatherings with curiosity. Remember that no one is perfect, so try not to take things too personally.
Embrace the situation
![Vacation annoyances](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Holiday-annoyances-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x682.jpg)
![Vacation annoyances](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Holiday-annoyances-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x682.jpg)
Whether you adore your in-laws or find it difficult to get along with them, the holidays are here, and they are here to stay. Accept the fact that you will be spending time together, and don't let minor annoyances spoil the visit.
Avoid people pleasing
![Young hispanic woman dressed as mama noel holding bag isolated on blue background with fingers crossed and wishing the best](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/People-pleasing-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
![Young hispanic woman dressed as mama noel holding bag isolated on blue background with fingers crossed and wishing the best](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/People-pleasing-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
Although it's natural to want to make a good impression, you don't have to go overboard trying to please everyone. Be yourself and allow your partner's family to get to know you for who you really are. Saying “no” when needed is perfectly acceptable.
Choose your battle
![Beautiful young woman wearing christmas hat over crazy and crazy isolated background is screaming and shouting with aggressive expression and raising her arms. The concept of frustration.](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Choose-your-battles-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x580.jpg)
![Beautiful young woman wearing christmas hat over crazy and crazy isolated background is screaming and shouting with aggressive expression and raising her arms. The concept of frustration.](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Choose-your-battles-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x580.jpg)
The holidays don't have to be a time for family showdowns. Discuss potential issues with your partner in advance and create a plan to deal with any conflicts. Setting boundaries is essential, and you don't have to get into confrontations with family members.
Be diplomatic
![A couple discusses problems with a relationship counselor](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Be-diplomatic-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x684.jpg)
![A couple discusses problems with a relationship counselor](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Be-diplomatic-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x684.jpg)
Complaining or treating your in-laws badly will not change their habits. Treat them with compassion and patience, just as you would your family during a difficult situation. Let your partner take the lead in resolving conflicts with his or her parents.
Buddy arrives
![Beautiful happy young couple showing thumbs up and looking at camera over yellow background](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Couple-buddy-up-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
![Beautiful happy young couple showing thumbs up and looking at camera over yellow background](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Couple-buddy-up-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
Create a buddy system with your partner to support each other during potentially difficult moments. Recognize the signs that your patience is nearing the end of either of you and find ways to step away from the situation briefly to calm down.
Have an exit plan
![Man handwriting exit strategy with black marker on visible screen. Isolated on background. Business, technology and internet concept. Photo album](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Exit-strategy-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x767.jpg)
![Man handwriting exit strategy with black marker on visible screen. Isolated on background. Business, technology and internet concept. Photo album](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Exit-strategy-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x767.jpg)
If all else fails and the situation becomes unhealthy or abusive, make an exit plan. Create a safe word or phrase with your partner and agree to remove yourselves from such situations before they escalate. You should never feel obligated to put up with dysfunction or abuse.
Take care of your relationship
![Old and young couple eating together outdoors](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Nurture-Your-Relationship-family-meal-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x682.jpg)
![Old and young couple eating together outdoors](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Nurture-Your-Relationship-family-meal-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x682.jpg)
Consider this holiday season as an opportunity to strengthen your relationship with your in-laws. Don't just “show up” at gatherings; Get involved with your new family and make an effort to connect with them. Stepping out of your comfort zone can lead to personal growth and stronger relationships.
Make plans outside the home
![Middle-aged and older white couples walking on the beach together and talking full length in close-up](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Make-Plans-Outside-the-House-family-outing-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
![Middle-aged and older white couples walking on the beach together and talking full length in close-up](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Make-Plans-Outside-the-House-family-outing-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
Plan family outings with your in-laws, and focus on enjoying quality time together. Let your in-laws take the lead in spending time with family, and capture those moments in photos as meaningful gifts.
Prepare surprise activities
![happy birthday. An optimistic young man sits on the sofa next to his elderly parents and gives a birthday gift to his mother while sharing happiness with her husband](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Surprise-your-inlaws-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x684.jpg)
![happy birthday. An optimistic young man sits on the sofa next to his elderly parents and gives a birthday gift to his mother while sharing happiness with her husband](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Surprise-your-inlaws-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x684.jpg)
Surprise your in-laws with special activities or experiences to spend time apart from each other. Museum tickets or a reservation at their favorite restaurant can provide a much-needed respite.
Go to bed early
![Woman using tablet computer on bed](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Going-to-bed-early-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x682.jpg)
![Woman using tablet computer on bed](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Going-to-bed-early-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x682.jpg)
Sometimes, the best way to keep your sanity is to get some rest. Going to bed early can give you and your partner some alone time, and you can use the excuse of being tired from dealing with the festivities.
Practice self-care
![Happy couple doing quarantine exercises at home, self-isolation together, stretching, exercising, health care at home. Young Arab couple with closed eyes doing yoga and sitting on lotus flower on the floor](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Practice-self-care-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
![Happy couple doing quarantine exercises at home, self-isolation together, stretching, exercising, health care at home. Young Arab couple with closed eyes doing yoga and sitting on lotus flower on the floor](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Practice-self-care-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
Remember to take care of yourself. It's okay to step back from holiday preparations and find moments of self-care to recharge your batteries and stay in a positive mindset.
Don't mess with your wife
![The concept of discussion between husband and wife](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Nitpick-with-Your-Spouse-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x733.jpg)
![The concept of discussion between husband and wife](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Nitpick-with-Your-Spouse-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x733.jpg)
Stay on the same team with your spouse and avoid unnecessary arguments. Choose your battles wisely and focus on what really matters.
Do you have answers ready?
![Parents and adult children standing with drinks in the park](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Canned-answers-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x682.jpg)
![Parents and adult children standing with drinks in the park](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Canned-answers-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x682.jpg)
Prepare polite responses to uncomfortable or inappropriate questions in advance. Having these answers ready can help you maintain your composure and keep the peace.
Patience is a virtue
![Adult son with his parents on the sofa](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Patient-with-your-parents-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
![Adult son with his parents on the sofa](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Patient-with-your-parents-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
Give your in-laws the benefit of the doubt and try to see the good intentions behind their actions. Remember, they are spending the holidays with you because they care about your family.
breathes
![Portrait of a couple of men and women breathing deep fresh air together at sunset](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Breathe-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
![Portrait of a couple of men and women breathing deep fresh air together at sunset](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Breathe-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x683.jpg)
Even when your in-laws get on your nerves, take a deep breath and stay calm. Most of the time, everyone tries to create unforgettable moments for the family. Don't let minor annoyances ruin your holiday spirit.
Remember, it's temporary
![Christmas, happy family and people on holiday at home celebrating on holiday and bonding at home. Selfie of men and women on sofa or sofa in December celebrating together in living room.](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Family-holiday-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x677.jpg)
![Christmas, happy family and people on holiday at home celebrating on holiday and bonding at home. Selfie of men and women on sofa or sofa in December celebrating together in living room.](https://www.colemanconcierge.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Family-holiday-via-Deposit-Photos-1024x677.jpg)
Finally, keep in mind that the holiday season is temporary. Take it one day at a time, be patient, and focus on the end goal. You only need to spend a limited number of days together.
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