Big life changes often go hand in hand with cleaning the house, but that doesn't mean it's the same every time. Downsizing a home for retirement is a different process than decluttering after someone passes away. One author said that the way a person clears the space for the next trimester should be known as “right sizing.”
In her latest book, “Rightsize Today to Create Your Best Life Tomorrow,” Marnie Jameson explores the concept of “Rightsize” after downsizing homes after losing loved ones, going through divorce and merging families with her widowed husband. . Jameson is also the author of a syndicated column titled “At Home with Marnie Jameson.”
“I've gotten very good at getting rid of things,” she said.
Everyone approaches retirement differently, as does moving houses. Some people believe they will stay in their current home by default, or may feel an emotional connection to it because of the years they spent there raising a family, Jameson said. But retirees should instead ask themselves whether their current home is truly the best place for them in their later years, and if not, where would that ideal place be instead?
Jameson spoke with MarketWatch about “right sizing” and how to approach this task.
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Market monitoring: What exactly does “right size” mean to you?
Marnie Jameson: I define it as moving into or creating the perfect home – physically, emotionally, and financially. All of these pieces have to click. People don't take the longest offer enough. They stay where they are and do the same thing every day. I think they are missing out on an opportunity to move on and have a better life.
MW: Can you extend?
Jameson: I think a lot of people are in denial, and don't want to think about it. They say mobility is a big problem, and I have to say that's no reason to live a less-than-best life. Get over these problems and dream a little. This is what my book set out on paper. What would your best life look like? where is she? What type of home do you want to be in – a closed apartment, or a single family where the grandchildren can come home? On the water, golf course? What do you like to do and what stops you?
The four things that hold people back are: First, their stuff. If furniture is standing between you and a better life, think about it carefully. There are a lot of places now, like Facebook Marketplace and Craigslist. There are people you can hire to sell your beautiful items. Don't let that be a hindrance.
People say their memories and all the great times. You can have great times next door, and your memories will stay with you. You have to take them, so memories are not a good reason to stay in a house that no longer serves you.
People fear change. Everyone does. Change is coming to you anyway. So again, we never know how many days we have on this earth.
And self-satisfaction. Just being lazy. I like to say, don't let laziness and fear of these things hold you back. I'm trying to dissect it one obstacle at a time.
MW: What do people who have gone through this process and are on the other side say?
Jameson: It's amazing – 26% of people who moved in the last five years moved to a new state. Not just in the same state, they moved to a new state. This is very brave. They left everything they knew behind. 88% of them were happy with that. This is very certain.
I truly believe in course correction. Sometimes the change is right but the change you make is wrong, so you should always be smart and allow yourself a “what if” plan. What if it doesn't work? So I moved from Colorado to Florida 10 years ago. I said what if it doesn't work? I knew I could come back to Colorado. I knew I could do a U-turn. Fortunately, Florida loved me and my daughter and it worked out. But just know that you can course correct.
MW: In your experience, have you found that your disposal processes change based on the situation, such as after a death, divorce, or just downsizing for retirement?
Jameson: The thinking and filters are a little different. When you clean my parents' house, which everyone has to do for their parents or in-laws or grandparents, it's a different process because these are the people you loved and they are holding on to things and because you love them, you have to be the person you love. Judging what is important and why. Find out what's valuable, not financially, but to your family, and what can really be turned into something more useful, like donating a wedding dress to the local theater department. When you have that extra dimension of wanting to respect their life, it becomes more difficult than going through your own stuff.
I got divorced after 24 years of marriage and married a widower. Going through his things, there were more landmines because there were things that belonged to his late wife. He didn't want her ghost to live with us but he also wanted to respect her. I cover it in another book. What to keep and what to leave changes with circumstances and stages in life.
MW: Is there any step anyone can take now to correct their size?
Jameson: This is not a one and done. Rights are a way of life. You can't arrange your house and then expect it to stay that way, because things are always coming and life is always changing. So you need to have a mindset of what you want to be around you. I think this is something you should think about all the time. Just constantly clear out your garage or kitchen cabinets.
I like to have a trial class, it makes it less painful. Put a bag in the garage and closet and put the border items there. I see what it's like to live without them, and when it's full, I take another look and then bring it to Goodwill. It's less final and more transitional, and it helps people separate. Most of us will find that the fewer items we have on hand, the less we have to maintain and keep clean, and the more easily we can move around with fewer resources. It's a way of life.
This interview has been edited for clarity and length.
