cousin: I understand you mean well, but it’s really none of your business.
In addition you would expect; You “believe” that they are referring to something. If you’re going to, assume they absolutely love the name.
Reply to: Baby Mateo: Why would they share the baby’s name beforehand if they weren’t genuinely interested in hearing our opinion?
unknown: I can’t tell if I’m having a meltdown.
People can share names for about a million reasons, not including hearing negative comments about a name.
Even if the name chosen was overtly appropriated (which Mateo isn’t, in my opinion irrelevant), I still think the bar for negative comments is set in the outer shell.
Other readers’ thoughts:
This is why you should not share your child’s name until he is born. Nobody can give an opinion after that (or can, but it won’t change anything).
The only response to a baby name that isn’t yours is, “How sweet/pretty/cute/etc.”
Hi Caroline: Someone I’ve known since grade school just announced that they have feelings for me. I told them I didn’t see anything going on between us. I kind of did, “It’s not you, it’s me,” moaning about plans that might take me to a new part of the country soon. I do not share their feelings, although I love them very much as a friend.
What are the best practices now when I interact with them? We cross paths quite often – and we used to hang out together on purpose, but I suspect that will stop now.
This is me: Why should you stop? Different people have different reactions, so there is no one rule. Some people in your friend’s shoes will want to step back, regroup and try to move past the feelings. Others may be really annoyed that honesty is costing them a valuable friendship, and they’d rather be trusted to handle platonic friendship only like adults. A little embarrassment to work through, then business as usual.
The only way to know the person you’re with is to be honest, kind, and flexible: “Hey, I’d like to stay friends, but I don’t want to do anything insensitive. Are we okay? Or would you like some space?”
If you’re “suspicious” because that’s what your friend pointed out or alluded to, then picture me putting it all on the back burner and saying yeah, if that’s what they want, your intentional hangouts will have to stop. But then best practice is to be friendly, not make assumptions and remain receptive to their friendship if/when they welcome back a purely platonic friendship.
Also, regardless, he retired the line—lying—about the potential move. Own Your Feelings: “I am flattered and value friendship dearly, but my interests don’t go beyond that.” By wrapping the word ‘no’ in fluff, you are falsely implying that you will say yes if you choose not to move.
